Recently, the “trad wife” or traditional wife trend has been on the rise, gaining traction through social media platforms like TikTok. Influencers such as Nara Smith and Hannah Neeleman (also known as Ballerina Farm) have garnered significant attention, inspiring many women to follow in their footsteps.
A traditional wife refers to a married woman who embraces traditional gender roles, choosing to focus on homemaking, raising children, cooking and supporting her husband as the primary breadwinner. It’s a lifestyle framed by some as a return to simplicity, family values and personal fulfillment, but others view it as romanticizing an outdated and restrictive social structure.
The roots of the “trad wife” concept are largely grounded in the post-war era from the 1940s to the 1960s. During this time, economic prosperity made it more feasible for families to live on a single income. With men returning from war and reclaiming dominance in the workforce, the media actively promoted and glorified the housewife role. Advertisements, television shows and magazines painted domestic life as the ultimate source of happiness and fulfillment for women. This cultural push wasn’t just a social preference but also an economic strategy to free up jobs for men.
Hannah Neeleman, the most famous “trad wife” influencer, is known for her farm life and cooking content under the name Ballerina Farm, with over 20 million followers across three different social media platforms. Neeleman impacts the way women view traditional gender rules and homemaking, promoting a lifestyle centered around home tending and children raising. A Juilliard graduate who left her career as a professional ballet dancer, Hannah Neeleman chose to marry Daniel Neeleman and raise eight children on a ranch in Utah. Daniel Neeleman’s father is a billionaire who owns multiple commercial airlines, including JetBlue, which has raised concerns among some followers about the nature of Hannah’s marriage, given the significant power and wealth her father-in-law holds. Some of her followers question whether she was pressured into the marriage.
Hannah Neeleman’s videos often showcase her cooking from scratch, milking cows and making butter. She always appears perfectly composed on camera, in full makeup, with effortless grace. The curated lifestyle she presents suggests that farm life and raising eight children can be a beautiful, fulfilling choice. However, a Sunday Times article published on July 20 uncovered some of the realities behind this seemingly perfect life. While Neeleman initially wanted to date for at least a year before getting married, the couple tied the knot after just three weeks of dating. By the third month, she was pregnant with their first child and had to abandon her dreams of becoming a professional ballerina in New York City. Although she once planned to turn a barn into a personal ballet studio, that space eventually became the schoolroom for their children. Daniel Neeleman also admitted that Hannah Neeleman sometimes gets so exhausted from her responsibilities that she becomes bedridden for a week. Altogether, these details paint a grim picture of a life that feels more controlled and draining than the idealized version sold online.
From Neeleman’s story, we know that the “trad wife” trend can be dangerous, as women can see her videos and want to adopt a similar lifestyle of home tending and making their husbands the sole breadwinners. However, even Neeleman herself breaks the “husbands as the sole breadwinners” mold, as she generates income herself as an influencer by filming videos and posting them on social media. Women who are simply following the trend can be susceptible to financial dangers that arise from divorce or widowhood. By relying on a single income source, women lose their say financially, which can result in them being heavily controlled or even manipulated by their husbands.
While the “trad wife” trend presents an idealized image of traditional family values and personal fulfillment, it also carries significant risks that deserve careful consideration. The lifestyle, often romanticized through social media, overlooks the challenges many women face in such roles. Influencers like Hannah Neeleman may portray a seemingly perfect life, but the reality behind this lifestyle can be more restrictive and exhausting than it appears. As the trend grows, it is crucial for women to recognize the importance of financial independence, self-sufficiency and the ability to make informed decisions, as it provides them with autonomy and protects their personal freedom.
